The question above was posed to me by my darling Husband a while back and up until that point, I don’t think I’d realised that I did it. I had a caesarean with Sausage and I think I thought that pelvic floor exercises were something for those who’d managed to squeeze a human out of their fanny. But there’s no denying it, since childbirth, be it through the chuff or out of the sunroof, my pelvic floor has definitely weakened.
A couple of months ago, I had a stinking cough (not stinking because I stink of wee, honest) and on more than one occasion, I went into a coughing fit and came out of the other end with more than just a clear throat. There’s…leakage, shall we say? I’m not talking full-on piss-your-pants, just…oh shut up, you know what I mean, right? RIGHT?! Don’t leave me hanging here!
This isn’t easy to talk about for anyone, this post will probably be read by lots of people who know me in real life who I’ll probably now notice sniffing me to see if they can detect L’Eau de Urine next time we meet. But the fact is, it happens. Unless you’re a yoga bunny or have a tuppence that’s more toned than Jody Marsh’s new physique, the chances are you’ll have wee’d when you sneeze (Mammywoo, I’m looking at you love )
Anyway. The point to all of this public humiliation is that I’ve been sent something to review. It’s called a Kegel8 Ultra (RRP £117.99) and it’s an electronic muscle stimulator to help with stress incontinence. You know those Slendertone things you strap to your belly to give you abs without doing a million sit-ups? Imagine that, but distinctly more…probey.
I started using it last night, and despite Husband’s insistence that it’s was probably just an elaborate vibrator and that he could probably rig it up to the mains for me if the supplied 9V battery wasn’t doing it for me, there’s noting pleasurable about it. It feels very weird. You can feel the whole area tensing up and for the first five minutes I had to sit and look at the display so that I could tell when it was about to go off, so that it didn’t take me by surprise, but you get used to it after a while and I even increased the intensity of the contractions a couple of times.
It’s easy to set up and use (although there wasn’t any lube in the box, as per the contents) and there are unlimited amounts of programs and options for you to choose from depending on the severity and cause of the problem, so it can be used by just about anybody (apparently there’s also an, erm, well, an anal attachment available separately, although I don’t even want to think about that!).
I’ll update you on my progress as I go along, I’m supposed to use it every day for 20 minutes and I’m not sure how long it’ll be before I see an improvement, but I may give it a month and then go and sit in the doctors surgery so that I can get another horrid cough and really test my new noonie muscles out. Jokes.
So yeah. I wee when I cough. But I bet you do too, so that’s okay.
I’ve also, very kindly, been given 10 Kegel8 Day Toners (RRP £29.99) to give away to my lovely readers, just do the usual business with the widget below to be in with a chance of winning. Please read the Terms and Conditions of entry on the widget before entering.